Speeches and Lando's song

I'm writing this in speech class while other people do their speeches. I've already done mine, so I don't have to pay attention. The way we have to do the speeches that we are doing now is interesting. We had to pick two different topics from a list of topics that he thought of while watching T.V. All the topics were really crappy, so no body had a topic that they were fully interested in. Anyway, after you choose two, he 'randomly' chose you another topic (they were actually not random, he just said they were.). So then you had three topics that you had to research and prepare speeches for. But then that day, he held up three note cards with a one, a two, or a three on it. By choosing one of the note cards, you were choosing which speech you were going to give, leaving the other two topics to poop their pants and cry in the corner from not getting picked. The funny thing was, you could easily see the number through the cards, so you could choose which two topics you want to watch clean up large piles of human manure.

Someone just mentioned a cow in one of their speeches, and Lando's brightened up like a little girl who just got the crap beat out of them by a Jonas brother. Because they wouldn't care that they were in average pain (A Jonas brother couldn't hit that hard), because they would be so exited that a Jonas brother touched them.

Back to Lando.

He perked up when they mentioned cows. For some reason, he really likes cows. Why? Why would he like cows? I mean, I like cows as much as the next cotton candy seller, but they are not that special. In History class, we had to pick something that we were learning about, and illustrate it. I drew Gandhi weaving his own clothes. He took the simple detail that one country traded beef, and made it into what he wanted. His drawing was one cow. One single thin pen outline of a cow, with three spots, and the eyes of a kid on a sugar high.

Another thing about Lando that's worth writing about is that he made up a song. Not a cleverly rhyming song with twenty verses, a four line song. I think he made it up in wrestling practice. This is how it goes.

'Ring-a-ding-ding-ding,

The cat is in the bathtub,

Thanks for the bacon,

Ring-a-ding-ding-dong.'

Speaking of Lando, he is giving his speech now, and his topic is 'which crimes are felonies'. That kinda shows you how crappy the topics were. Anyway, it made me think, since some states have the death penalty enabled in the options menu, and some don't, why do people still do crimes punishable by death in the states with the death penalty? Why don't they go to the other states and do them there? If it were how it should be, the crime rates would be extremely lower it the states with it enabled. I dunno. It might actually be, and I just don't know. Oh well.

Oh yeah, I got sick of Age of Empires, and it's NOT just because I suck. I just got sick of it. Don't even ask me about it. I won't talk about it.

I forgot to start writing down everybody's funny childhood stories, so I will start that today. I dunno if I will post one tomorrow or not, because I might be too busy working on the childhood story mass blog, but I know for sure that I won't be posting all of next week becaus eof exams. I know this really doesn't matter to anyone, because I have no readers outside of my school, and if I ever do, that week will already be over, and I would have began to post again, but I like to sound like I have a truck load and a half of readers. It makes me feel good.

This blogs rules, and Smeagolish behavior.

Yesterday, on Tuesday (Aww, it's only Wednesday), I didn't post anything, and I have a good excuse for it. I had a runny nose, and it prevented me completely from typing anything. Seriously, I was physically unable to type anything blog related. The truth is no where near that excuse (I just didn't feel like doing it.), but it is a good excuse anyway. It's ok that I didn't put anything, because I am not going to be like shaycarl, or Charlestrippy (or however his name is spelt, I don't know, I don't watch his videos. One daily vlog is enough.), by posting one up every single day for months at a time without missing a single one. Basically, I'm going to as many days as I can (or feel like), except for on the weekends. I have more important things to do on the weekends, like maplestory. Y'know, stuff that I can only do on the weekends. Also, during the summer, I will post much less, but I will. In the summer it will always depend on what time I wake up in the morning. Or afternoon. I think they will be shorter during the summer, because I will be too lazy to write, but more interesting, because I will actually do things worth writing about. Also, if I go on a car trip, they will be beastly long because I will have nothing else to do in the car.

With a little over two weeks of school left in the year, every single day except for Monday feels like a Friday. Mondays… just feel slow and stupid, until the end of the day when you think it is Tuesday, because then you feel stupid. Aggh. Every week seems longer than the last, and every weekend feels even shorter.

I like four letter words, which is why I use them a lot. Words like Aggh, argh, haha, y'know stuff like that. Also reading over what I write, I use a LOT of contractions, even though I had that one paragraph on how I think they are stupid. I still like them though, and a probably use them so much because that how I talk. I blend words together and I speak kind lazily. Sometimes when I am way too lazy to move my mouth to say something, but someone asks me a question, I just grunt. The way I grunt lets them know exactly what I mean, so I don't need to explain. A frequent example is when someone passes by me in the hallway and says hi. I am too tired and lazy to say hi back so I grunt in a way that they can translate as hi. Usually I do this right when I wake up in the morning, when my eyes still are crusty and haven't adjusted to the bright light yet. People try to talk to me, but I just grunt. By now they've figured out that I'm really not a morning person, and that I'm still grumpy from not being able to watch the end of my dream and knowing that for countless hours I will be bothered from not knowing what happened to the main character. Spoiler alert; (<- semicolon. <- spelled right.) he fell into stomach fluid and became badly disfigured, and probably die. Also, his house that he completely built out of Jell-o completely caved in, killing his wife and kids (Seriously, why doesn't that happen in Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs? I was anxiously waiting for it to happen, but

when they left the house and it DID'NT happen, I was convinced that they were going to come back to that Jell-o house, and it was going to collapse then).

Hmm, what was I non-rudely saying before rude Eric Pankow rudely interrupted. How rude of him. Oh yeah, I'm not a morning person. A good example happened in the beginning of the year, when they didn't fully understand how grumpy I can get in the morning (they still don't have a full grasp, they still try to talk to me, I know, how rude!). I sleep on the bottom bunk of Matt and my bunk bed, which was crammed up in the wall. His blanket is king sized, so he shoved half of it between his mattress and the bed frame. He had already gotten out of bed, and the blanket was hanging over, completely closing off my bunk like a dark cave. Oh the days of my dark warm cave. Anyway, I was sleeping in the cave, and, unknown to me, everyone was crowded around my bed, ready to pounce if they needed to. Miller slowly crept up, probably doing that raptor walk thing that he does, which you may not known about you, you person reading this (Congratulations to you for reading this far by the way.).

Anyway, Miller crept up, bent over, grabbed the corner of my blanket, and pulled. Somehow I woke up fast enough to grab it, but he kept on pulling it. I was grumpy (the main character was in a fight with a giant red worm), and I wanted my blanket, so I burst out of the cave. Miller was still holding the blanket, so I attacked with great ferocity. The all of a sudden exposure to cold air didn't make me any happier. I punched and kicked, probably looking REALLY stupid. Actually, I should probably say 'drowsily flailed my body part in the vague direction of Miller'. He finally let go, and, like Smeagol, I scampered back into my cave. That was my side of the story, and his is probably different, but now you see how people mess with me in the morning as well as how much of a morning person I am not.

Why am I starting this Blog? (It's a boring title, trust me I know.)

A couple of my friends have done it, and I have wanted to do it for so long, I am going to do it, I am going to start a blog! Wow. The second half of that sentence probably made you really hate me. But seriously, I can remember when I was a little kid, and I used to write in my little Harry Potter journal under the bed with a flashlight, even though it was the middle of the day and I could have just as easily done it on the kitchen table. It might have even been easier on the table. I probably will post what I wrote in there later, just to bring back memories and to take up space in this blog. Plus maybe it will make you hate me more, because hate is a good thing right? Be hateful to your friends and neighbors. I don’t know.

Now if you are trying to punch me through your computer screen because I keep rambling on about nothing, stop, because I am going to start being serious. Mostly because my cat is doing it too. Just kidding, my cat doesn’t have a computer. Actually, I don’t even have a cat. But that’s not the point. In the next paragraph, I am going to actually talk about what is in the title, which is why I am starting this blog. Go ahead. Go to the next paragraph.

Ok, I lied. Go to the NEXT paragraph, for some real seriously not serious blogging.

That’s a good reader. To be boring and to get straight to the point (which I actually haven’t done, look at how much I have wrote so far), the first reason I am starting this blog is so that I can feel more accomplished about my life so far. I am constantly on the internet, and I see many videos of what people have made and what people have done, some at a very young age. Like one young boy programmed a finger-painting iphone app., and he was less that ten years old. This makes me look at how average my life is, and this blog will help me to feel more accomplished. I mean seriously!

I’m not sure why I said ‘I mean seriously!’ in the last paragraph, but I did so your just going to have to sit there and take it like a man/woman! Actually, I probably won’t get any female readers. I’m not very smooth with the opposite gender. Excluding my dog. But that doesn’t count.

The second reason I am writing this blog is because… (Bathroom break)
The second reason I am writing this blog is because of one man, Shay Carl. Shay Carl is a famous YouTuber who has recorded a video of his hysterical life every single day for over a year now, all averaging around ten minutes per video. It is not just that that makes me like him so much, its his personality. Shay just has a way of joking his way, into your brain, and then locking himself in there. Even though you wouldn’t want to, if you pounded on the door and yelled for him to open up and come out, like a stubborn child, he would not unlock the door to your brain. I make this sound like a bad thing, but no. This is a very good thing, but he is just very addicting in a good way. I hope you understand.

ERIC! YOU ARE RAMBLING AGAIN!

Oops. I’m sorry, the reason Shay made me want to make this blog is that I realized, that even though it is a lot of work for him to record, edit, and upload all those videos every day, when he is older, he can go back and watch when his kids were almost babies. His kids can do this too. So this made me want to do something like that, where I can look back on my life, and think of all the good times that I have had. And cry. Wait, who just typed that part? It certainly wasn’t me!
This is getting pretty long, but I have one thing to say. Even though I am doing this almost as much for my entertainment as yours, I promise that I will keep this going for longer than the average blog, and I hope that it will be entertaining for you.